Sometimes the truth hurts.
Anyone who has followed me for a while will know I'm a huge supporter of the work of Saying Goodbye. Yesterday they launched their new campaign and I quite honestly think it's brilliant.
Sometimes I feel like there are 2 versions of me.
The one the world sees...
And the one it doesn't.
No 'real' ties.
Attempting to forge a career.
Travelling as much as possible and
to an outsider -
free as a bird.
And then there's me, the woman who lost a baby.
Who can be reduced to tears by an ill-placed advertisement.
Who often wakes up in a cold sweat from nightmares.
Who entirely blames herself.
Losing B has been well and truly categorised as
A Thing Of The Past.
And that's fine -
we can't hold on forever.
But for me it's not in the past.
It's a very real and ever-present part of my
I'm not the same person I was
(I wouldn't want to be).
The only way I can honour my baby is through my own life.
So I fund raise, I support, I listen
(and occasionally crumble a little when the memories get too much).
You may think I'm childless
but the truth is -
my child didn't get to stay.
I am a Mother.
This is my truth.
@SayingGoodbyeUK on Twitter